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Coco & her LBD

Q - "You and many others have mentioned the necessity for a "little black dress" but why? And how do I keep it my style?  They all seem to be so "little!"
A:  Excellent questions both!  To which I offer the following answers and examples.

First, the Why.  Everyone needs in their closet the "instant elegant outfit."  Something you can put on and never have to question how nice you look.  Because this outfit must be appropriate for all occasions it has to be a versatile.  Versatile is easiest when it's in the form of a neutral base that can be accessorized a million different ways.  Black is universally flattering - every woman in the world can wear it in some way or another and look lovely.  It's the perfect backdrop to anything you'd like to do with it.  And no, it doesn't have to be "little". 
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Coco Chanel created the LBD (little black dress) around 1926, officially premiering it in Vogue that year.  Her design was only "little" in the sense of "simple".  It was actually very modest - calf length, long sleeved and trim fitting but not skin tight, with virtually no embellishment.  Until that point, all-black clothing was mainly reserved for funerals and periods of mourning.  It tended to be long and stuffy.  Her simple design, dubbed "Chanel's Ford" because it was versatile and intended for every woman, like the Model T for every driver, was simultaneously a revolution and instant classic.


It's nearly impossible to find pictures of Coco wearing the dress, but I found the one above that someone took with a stuffed monkey.

Second, the Personalization.  In answer to your other question, I offer the many examples below.  (Click the images to enlarge.)  The LBD you choose should a) speak to your social life and b) reflect your personal taste.  For example, if your social life consists of lots of fancy dinner parties with your husband's company and clients AND you like a dash of retro, you might choose something like the dress on the far right below.
If your social engagements tend to be more casual (dinner here and there, a movie, but maybe the ballet occasionally) and you like something sleek you might choose one of the short sleeved options below, or the wrap dress on the right.  
You can find everything from a vintage party dress to something very avant garde.  Embellished to the hilt or a blank canvas.  Personally, I think Coco had it right.  The more simple the dress, the more versatile it is.  You can throw a colored cardigan over a simple jersey LBD, add some flats and head out to run errands.  Swap the cardigan for sparkly accessories and the flats for heels and you're good to go for date night. I have two in my closet. A simple matte jersey wrap dress that gets the most use, and a fancier, layered chiffon dress for really special events.
If you noticed, I offered up only modest options.  And I wanted to showcase a few below from Shabby Apple.  For being a small boutique shop, their selection of LBD's is nicely varied to fit many tastes.  And all are modest without you having to modify.
So yes, whether it sweeps the floor in satin drama... or kisses the ground with bohemian relaxation, you need one of these dresses.  Take your time. (You didn't have it yesterday so you don't need it tomorrow.)  Enjoy the process. (Your perfect LBD match is out there!)  Buy the best you can afford. (This is most definitely an investment item!)
  And once you have it - WEAR IT! Wear it often, wear it well.
 
 
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Q: I'm finally losing weight (for good this time!) and have lost enough that my clothes no longer fit or look good.  I still have more to go, but what should I wear until I hit my goal weight?
A: Indeed a conundrum and I'm not making a joke!  This is a happy but difficult time. (Don't they say the same thing about pregnancy, when your weight is going the opposite direction?)  I'm actually in the same phase myself and enjoyed compiling this answer for you.  It helped me as well!

I always research answers.  Looking for the best style advice available.  And weeding out the bad!  I actually read the suggestion that you should wear a "poncho" while you're losing weight.  Say what???  Sure.  Let's throw a broad expanse of fabric over our shoulders, hiding any shape, and let it fall down from one of the widest parts of our body, our breasts.  Great idea.  I don't think they realize that any tent-like shape will just make a person appear larger.  A poncho pretty much only looks half-way decent if you're a small person. 

One question we have to ask ourselves is, are we talking short-term or long-term weight you're losing?  Short-term as in, "I just had a baby and will probably be back in my previous clothes by the end of the year." or long-term as in, "I've been battling this blasted bulge for twenty years and I'm finally winning the war!"  Short-termers tend to have "skinny" clothes and little else.  Long-termers may or may not.  You definitely sound like the latter so I'm going to guess that, like most people, you probably have a range of smaller sizes in your closet.  So gird your loins and try on some of those smaller sizes! Do NOT beat yourself up if they still don't fit yet.  They will soon!  And if they already do, you'll be a happy camper.  You might also consider organizing your closet by size - largest to smallest - and work your way through them as you lose weight.

If you do find yourself needing/wanting to purchase some new items, consider the following:
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  • Wrap dresses! Wrap dresses!  Wrap ANYTHING!  Skirts, blouses, etc.  They get smaller with you by simply wrapping them tighter.
  • Tailor a little bit.  If you've dropped two sizes, take your best pieces to be altered.  It'll be less expensive than buying them in a new size.  Check out the recent post about Tailoring.
  • Avoid anything boxy.  Something that fits your shape now will look MUCH better as it gets a little baggy than something that was boxy and ill-fitting to begin with.
  • Don't spend a ton of money.  Depending on how much weight you still have to lose, you might have to repeat this cycle a few more times. (Target has excellent inexpensive options!) But don't think of the new items as a waste either.  Consider the clothes an investment in yourself (you deserve it!) as well as a donation.  You'll wear them very often then donate them where hopefully some other woman will wear them on her way to a healthier weight.  Pat yourself on the back for being a philanthropist!
  • Don't forget your intimates!!  That bra probably needs updating at this point!
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  • Wear what you have in a new way.  Button down shirts that are too big?  Go retro and tie them over a fitted tee. Cute! Or leave them completely unbuttoned and wrap them around yourself, crossing the button side over the buttonhole side, and tucking them into pants or skirts that fit you.  Very fashion forward!
  • Buy neutrals but amp up those shoes!! (Click here for my soap box speech about the benefit of great shoes!)  When buying those few items, keep them neutral and you'll be able to mix and match them into many more combinations.  Offset the neutrality with fabulous shoes in great colors!
  • Think Shrink!  Like the wrap dresses, think of pieces that will shrink with you.  For example, a light cardigan with not too much structure (as in not too fitted, without a complicated design) will hang straight now, creating a vertical line.  As you continue to shrink, you button it, then later, cinch it up with a belt.  Make sense?
  • Watch those accessories!  Accessories (just like prints) should be proportional.  Tiny, delicate necklaces & bracelets will emphasize your size in an unflattering way.

Set yourself a time limit.  This applies if you have nothing much in your closet that looks good.  If at the end of, say, 3 months, you haven't lost the weight you had hoped to, still buy something that makes you look good.  If you DID lose the weight you planned on, buy something in your new size.  Either way, you'll look and feel better.

And finally, you may ask, "Why not just thrown on the sweats or leggings and stick it out to the end?"  What you see in the mirror has a PROFOUND affect on your psyche, your self- esteem, and your attitude.  You've been working hard.  Rewarding yourself along the way will keep your motivation from waning.  Congratulations!  Keep fighting the good fight! 

 
 
Here's another great question we received!

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Q: Help! I have a funeral to attend but I don't want to wear black.  My sister passed away after a lifetime of battling illness.  Our family wants to celebrate her many victories, instead of mourning in dark clothes.  What in the world do I choose that will be appropriate?


A:  What a wonderful idea to celebrate her at an obviously difficult time.  I've never enjoyed black for funerals.  I guess I look for any small way to express joy for the person's life.  Sometimes dark clothing is the only appropriate option but in this case, where you've agreed as a family to strike out from the norm, I definitely see your dilemma.  Sticking with an overall conservative ensemble will still be the most respectful of the occasion but here are a couple of options to complete your look.

1. Something that was her favorite.  Is there a dress, blouse or skirt she always loved on you?  If it's conservative, pair it with a neutral piece and a piece of jewelry she gifted you.
2.  Something you bought together or matching.  We're not talking those matching Tweedle-Dee/Tweedle-Dum t-shirts here, but maybe there's a nice dress, etc. that you both loved so much you each bought one.
3.  Something in her favorite color or her favorite color on you.  Maybe she always loved it when you wore yellow, even though it was a big fashion step for you. 
4.  Something she made you.  Many people today make their own jewelry and other accessories nowadays.  Do you have a piece or two she did for you?  Choose a neutral ensemble that will really showcase that item.
5.  If all else fails, choose a conservative outfit that flatters you, and accessorize with her favorite flower.  And think outside the lapel!  Flowers will look beautiful and elegant in your hair or on a simple ribbon choker around your neck.  Even the retro wrist corsage is a chic option.

As a side note for those attending funerals but who aren't related to the deceased, take your cue for appropriate attire from the family.  Start by researching the religious and cultural systems of the bereaved family.  For example, Korean's wear white to funerals.  Buddhists frown on red.  Hindu's wear white if you're a member of the family, otherwise you should wear dark colors.  Many customs, including Jewish, require women, men or both to cover their heads so bring a conservative scarf, just in case.

Are you in a style conundrum?  Submit your question to Image Interpreters and let us help!

 
 
Q:  Yikes! I am turning 50! What is off limits for a 5'8" and rather slender and mature-- never mind the mature part, change it to immature lady?

Well, Happy Birthday!  50 is the new 40, you know.  And in your lucky case, probably the new 35!  You ask a great question that too many people don’t ask until they’re already looking frumpy and grumpy or even worse, are deep into trashy territory.  

Two things will age you faster than the sun – Mom Jeans and dumpy shoes.  If either of these style assassins currently resides in your closet then part of your 50th birthday present to yourself should be to replace them.  So with that said, let’s list the most important things to know.

Off Limits:

  1. Mom Jeans.  It bears repeating!  Please refer to the Mom Jeans post for why and what to replace them with. 
  2. Dumpy shoes. I worked with a woman a few years ago who we all thought “looked good for almost 60” and she was actually 43!!  Her frumpy clothes and hairstyle added about 10 years but the real nail in her coffin was her shoes.  She wore black granny shoes with Velcro straps! You know the ones – laces for nurses, Velcro straps for grannies but otherwise the same.   At the Christmas party, I saw her in a lovely pair of pumps and excitedly declared that she should wear them more often.  Her answer was that her “comfy shoes are just so hard to give up.”  Too that I say, “Then don’t start!” Until your feet declare war on every other type of shoe avoid anything remotely granny or nurse-like.  Keep the heels as long as you possibly can!  At 5’8” they don’t have to be super high to have impact.  Incorporate flats in fun colors.  Modern sleek sneakers (think Puma!) in fantastic colors.  If ever there was a time to choose sleek, fun, statement-making shoes, it’s now!
  3. Holiday sweaters.  Strictly verboten for everyone over the age of 10.  Revisit these when you’re 80!  (I’ll still say no, but we can revisit them!)
  4. Too-long hemlines.  Too short is probably not an issue.  For most modest dressers, the hemlines are too long.  And especially as we get older, those hemlines should hit that knee!!  It’s elegant, ageless, and extremely leg flattering.  Don’t worry about buying all new skirts.  Most long ones can be hemmed up to the better length. 
  5. Anything baggy.  From here on out it’s all about shape!  Get it, create it, fake it.  Whatever it takes.  For some odd reason, the older people get, the more shapeless their clothes become.  So, no oversize blazers, boxy tops, shapeless sweaters and dresses, etc.
  6. Anything with shoulder pads.  If the pads can be removed without the garment losing shape, fine.  If not – consider the item donated.
  7. Overly tweezed eyebrows.  Pencil thin or drawn on eyebrows are detrimental to looking fresh.  Fuller, well-shaped brows are much more youthful.  There are about a million tutorials out there on how to shape and tweeze your eyebrows but it’s not rocket science.  Click here for a general step-by-step. Another tip for filling them in – use powder!!  I like Stila Brow Sets myself (check them out here).  Powder is by far easier to apply and looks much more natural than pencil.  Stila makes super easy to use sets and they last forever!!
  8. Retro trends from your childhood.  This is a tricky area.  It can look great because you have original pieces or it can look like you never grew up.  If I’d grown up in the 40’s and 50’s say, I’d absolutely want to pull out my full skirts and nip-waisted shirt dresses and join the current trend, upstaging the newbies on the street with my originals.  But I might look a little silly.  My formative fashion years, however, were the 80’s, so I’ll never know the joy or trauma of fashion revisited.  Peg leg jeans and parachute pants didn’t look good the first time and never will.  There is merit to the adage, “If you wore it the first time around, you can’t when it comes around again.” 
  9. Dark lipstick.  It can so easily draw attention to the fine lines around the mouth.  Pale pinks and peaches (NOT lighter than your natural lip color) with some gloss will always look youthful.
  10. Old lady swimsuits.  That would be anything with a skirt attached! A classic one piece with bust shaping and support is the only way to go.
  11. No flannel nightgowns!  Not that the rest of us are going to see it – but your husband will.  And you will.  PJ’s are the last thing you see at night and the first thing you see in the morning.  Bookending your days like that leaves an impression.  Even Victoria’s Secret makes cute pj sets with short-sleeved t’s and fun printed bottoms.  And whip out the sexy lingerie every once in a while!  
Must Haves:
  1. Really great bras!  No matter how large or small the cup size – gravity will do a number on those girls!  Lift ‘em and love ‘em!  Find a nice, shape-enhancing bra with underwire and BUY SEVERAL!
  2. A great pair of dark wash trouser jeans.  Have I made the point yet?  At your height, watch out for short jeans.  When standing barefoot the jeans should just touch the ground.  That length lets you wear them with flats as well as heels.
  3. A splash of current trends. Wearing 20-year old clothes when you’re 50… makes you look 60.  And trashy.  As a slender woman you still have the figure to wear anything you want so keep up with the trends – just a bit. Never updating your wardrobe or incorporating anything new will backfire on you as well.
  4. Keep what you love – tweak how you wear it. Don’t lose the things that are unique to your personality.  For example, if your whole life you loved leopard print – just don’t wear it all over.  Refine it to shoes or a scarf.  If your signature color is pink – ditch the track suit from earlier years and get a nice, sleek, v-neck tee in that color instead.
  5. Break up the structured suit occasionally.  You probably have one.  It’s more timeless to pair the jacket with jeans and the skirt with a twinset or more casual top.  You want to keep folks guessing about your age.
  6. Don’t be afraid of brights!  Senior-citizen pastels (you know the shades when you see them!) start to creep into wardrobes at about this age.  Brighter colors will provide more contrast for your skin and hair, keeping you fresh and bringing out your eyes.

For more tips and tricks, there are two books on this subject that get quoted all the time; Charla Krupp’s anti-aging bible, How Not To Look Old and Style Evolution: How to Create Ageless Personal Style in your 40’s and Beyond by Kendall Farr.  Kendall’s I haven’t read yet but Charla’s is great. It’s chock full of pictures clearly illustrating the points she’s making and it’s a fun read.  Your library should have both.

You know what will probably keep you young the longest – that “immature” streak you mentioned. Saucy and sassy are key elements to style. If only everyone could stay fun as they age.  It would keep us all so vibrant.  Never lose that part of you and you’ll be in great shape.