Q: "Most of my week I'm an exhausted mom but my husband and I renewed our commitment to regular date nights a little while ago.  The problem is, I'm wearing essentially the same things I wear the rest of the week! All my clothes are mom-friendly, modest, and (I hate to admit it) pretty frumpy.  I'm not sure how I got to this point but what should I do about it now? I have limited funds to put toward a solution and want to spend it wisely.
Sincerely - K.,  

A:  I think we've all been there, K! One day you're cute, glowing and pregnant, the next you haven't worn much besides yoga pants and a t-shirt for weeks on end. Here are my best tips for reclaiming the sexy factor of your wardrobe.  I'm going to assume you have a pair of well-fitting jeans.  If not, those are an A #1 priority.  And make sure they're not these Mom Jeans!
I've listed the other items in order of "investment importance" - meaning if you don't already have it, this is where I'd spend your money first.  And the key style tip?  Do the opposite!  I'll explain in a moment...

1.  A Fancy Heel
I suggest a metallic heel in gold or silver, depending on your preference and skin tone. 
A metallic is a neutral so it pairs with anything! Jeans and a black top, a spring dress, fun skirt and cardigan - a metallic heel elevates them all to sexy date-wear.

2.  Chandelier/Statement Earrings
I like crystal and metallic because, again, it goes with anything and everything.  A metallic heel, jeans, black tee, and earrings like these?  Do you see the sexy sneaking back?

FYI - White House/Black Market is having a jewelry sale right now.  Click through from our Shopping Section.  WH/BM has great neutral options.

3.  A little shot of boudoir.
Raid your lingerie collection for items with just a hint of sheerness or (if not sheer) a high enough neckline that you don't have to wear a coverage tee underneath it.  Try adjusting the straps to raise the neckline.  Doesn't matter if it's normally a thigh-grazing chemise - slip that baby on over jeans and under a fitted jacket and it's a very sexy tunic top!  Let something sparkly or satiny peek out from under a cardigan or blazer (buttoned for coverage if you need).  Your hubby will know what it is... and will love it.
I recently scored this little wrap number from the Liberty of London for Target intimates collection. It looks great with jeans or my dark gray skirt and heels.

4.  Update your Mom Do
If your husband normally sees you with your hair down, wear it up for date night.  Normally up in a pony?  Wear it sleek and flowing with a deep side part.  Normally straight? Stun him with a head full romantic curls.

And consider whether it's time to update your style completely.  A razor-sharp bob can be easy with kids, and styles up very sexy.  Layers can lift a longer style out of sagging and dragging.

5.  Learn Sexy Makeup
Another opposite?  Your makeup!  If you normally don't wear any makeup, your biggest bang for the buck will be to learn how to do a smoky eye.  It's sexy and does NOT have be done with black makeup, which can look harsh the older you get. I love a smoky eye in purples or browns.  A simple Google or YouTube search will produce hundreds of options for tutorials.  If you're near a Sephora or Nordstrom makeup department - pop in and have a makeup artist show you for free.
If you often wear heavier eye makeup, then go with a neutral eye (maybe just a little liner and mascara) paired with a bold lip.  It's the shake-up of your routine that brings the sexy here.

6.  Dye a New Outfit
Here's a final tip - dye some of your items to score a "new" date outfit. If you have plenty of "mom-friendly" tops but are in desperate need of some date wear, don't be afraid of dying!  How about updating that stained white tee to a gorgeous deep turquoise?  New clothes - for about $2.  Gotta love that!

It's interesting how different style issues suddenly catch your attention.  Over the last few weeks I've noticed quite a few skirt slit problems.  Women have either a) tried to stitch them partially or completely closed, b) left in the 'X' stitch from the manufacturer (Ach!), or c) given up and let their slip show through.  Less than stylish options all.
 
1.  Always, ALWAYS remove the little 'X' stitch before you wear something the first time.  You'll find it on jacket/coat, sport coat, and blazer slits as well.  It's meant to be removed.  The manufacturer slips it in there to keep the slit neatly closed during transport and display.
2.  It is almost never possible to completely close a slit without causing the skirt to pull awkwardly, ruining the line and look.  You might be able to get away with it if you have less than an inch that needs to be closed.  But if you're thinking that thigh-high slit on a skirt you really want will look fine as soon as you stitch it closed, you're wrong. 

So what are your options?  If the slit is too high for your comfort, don't buy the skirt.  Find another.  If the slit isn't TOO too high, and you're up for a little fun, try this nifty trick...

Sew in a nice piece of silk lining!

I chose an animal print for my black pencil skirt because I like the unexpected flash when I walk. You can also choose a color to match your skirt but really, this is a perfect place to have a little fun.  How about a gorgeous purple or pink silk lining on a grey skirt?  Or a lovely black and white polka dot on a black skirt?  Red lining with a khaki skirt? Yes!  

Silk scarves that you don't wear anymore are great because you already have them, the edges are already finished, and silk is strong.  This is a high tension area of a skirt.

If you have reasonable sewing skills you can do this yourself or take it to a tailor.  I've only done this once and I'm still refining the best way to do it.  If any of you have tips to suggest, I welcome them.  In essence, what you're doing is as follows:

1. Lay the skirt flat with the slit on top.  Hold the top flap up, forming an 'L' and have someone measure the widest distance when the ends of the slit are pulled apart.
2. Measure a quarter inch from the bottom of the skirt (or where your hem starts if it looks better) to the top of the slit. 
   
3. Using these two measurements, cut a triangle from your scarf.  The tip will go at the top of the slit, the wide end at the bottom.  Get it? Before sewing, iron a fold into the silk with right sides together.  This way, the silk lining will lay folded and flat within the skirt after you've sewn it, as opposed to bunching together.  I found that stitching a small seam at that fold did an even better job. 
   
4. Don't forget, if you don't have a piece of silk with a finished edge, you'll need to do that.  Don't want this fancy little lining to have raw, fraying edges. 
   
5. With neat, tiny stitches in the same color as your skirt, sew the lining to the wrong side of your skirt and voila!
   

I quickly mocked up the insert I'll be putting into one of my denim skirts.  When Christmas and New Year's have quieted down I'll have time to create a detailed tutorial. 

A key point to remember: this works best with slits that overlap.  'V' slits, where the edges don't overlap at all, and may or may not even meet will still work, but the insert will always be seen.

Many women avoid certain skirts because of this problem.  Pencil skirts are ULTRA flattering on any body type.  With this simple solution you no longer have to avoid them or settle for letting your slip show.  This very easy and cheap fix will make the skirt in question infinitely more wearable.  Hope it works for you!

This is Rachel McAdams in a Philip Lim dress.  And while that front slit would need a tweak, I loved the knotted neckline, swingy front ruffle and perky sleeves.  It's a stunning curve-hugging silhouette, not skin tight, and makes her look so feminine. 

You could completely do away with that front slit, or make it a small key-hole, and this dress would still be gorgeous.

So 40's!  So lovely!  And you know I love a retro style.  I expect you can't wear this dress and not have a wiggle in your walk and giggle in your talk.

I was awestruck.  Just look at them!  Click on the photo to make it larger and look at them some more.  These women are fabulous incarnate.  The antithesis of matronly.  The embodiment of sophisticated style and confidence.  They're clearly beyond their 40's.  I'd guess the one on the left is in her 60's and the one on the right in her 50's.  Considering how timeless they look, and judging only by their wonderful faces, they could be respectively in their 70's and 60's for all I know!

I want to look like this when I'm their age!  I absolutely adore this photo.  It's such an inspiration and it makes me smile. 
I can perfectly picture the withering look these two would give if you tried to convince them to wear a holiday sweater.  Or Mom Jeans. Or those high waisted pleated polyester pants that you never see in stores until you're over 70. 

Part of looking like this obviously means I'll have to visit Italy many more times.  Soaking up style works better on-location.  That's why I have my sister who speaks fluent Italian.  Britt- pack your bags!  We're going shopping!

Elaine's comment on my previous post reminded me that I hadn't yet posted a picture of the FANTABULOUS dress I won through a contest she had on her blog.  She's an adorable college student whose blog is great for image inspiration! Find her HERE and on our Image Inspiration page.  I like how she makes simple pieces not boring.

A few months ago she ran a contest to give away this dress from Shabby Apple.  I had never heard of Shabby Apple but I immediately loved the dress and scrambled to complete all the various options she had for entering.  And I won! 

Isn't this dress delicious!?  It's so... Mad Men.  So... 60's Sexy Secretary.  Just the right mix of sweet with a wink, you know?  And depending on how edgy or dressy I want to take the dress, I have 3 pair of shoes that will work perfectly.  

When choosing what size I wanted the dress in, the Shabby Apple website said that the dress was sized "generously", and as I've mentioned before, I'm on a quest to get in shape so I sized down.  It's a little small as yet, but rather than exchange it (they have a great exchange policy!) I kept this size.  It's my Reward Dress.  I love it so much I want to be able to wear it for a long time.  And I like having it smiling at me in the front of my closet.  Cheering me on. 

So stay tuned!  I will soon post a picture of me wearing it instead of the dress rack! Please visit Shabby Apple.  You can find them HERE on The Shopping Section.  They have wonderful, modest dresses without the frumpy shapes that so often disguise themselves as modest.

One of the perils of online shopping is the inability to try things on.  You're just not sure whether the item will fit you or not.  As I've mentioned before, knowing your measurements will alleviate much of that fear.  Never trust sizes - they're never the same between designers and stores.  But it's very rare to find a shopping site without a Size Guide.  Clicking on this handy little link will give you a chart (like the one pictured here from Banana Republic) outlining the basic measurements associated with that item.  There are usually specific size charts for jackets/outerwear, blouses, dresses/skirts, jeans/trousers as well as for regular, tall, petite, and plus.

Now, it's easy to measure your own bust, waist and hips in front of a mirror.  But any kind of length measurement without help is much harder.  Bending over to look at the tape measure obviously doesn't work.  Pressing the tape along your body almost always results in a wrong number.  But here's a little trick to determine if the length of an item will suit you or not.

Grab a flexible tape measure (these are dirt cheap at fabric stores!) and a small metal binder clip.

Fasten the binder clip onto the tape measure so that the little arms are directly over the desired measurement.  Now head to your full-length mirror! 

Say you want to know where a skirt that measures "21" from natural waist" will hit you.  At the knee?  Above the knee?  Just hold the 0 end at your natural waist and let the tape measure hang.  The binder clip provides just enough weight for the tape to hang straight and the little arms show you right where the 21" will be.  And because the tape is hanging, like the skirt will, you get an accurate measurement over your stomach and hips. 

This works with dresses and pants as well.  Try it and take advantage of that free-shipping a little more confidently!

People choose to live a modest lifestyle for many reasons.  Religion, upbringing, career dictates, age, personal taste.  As with any lifestyle choice, there's the possibility of a love/hate relationship with your decision.  We may love the message we're sending but hate that we can't wear certain styles.  Love that we rarely have to worry about looking trampy but hate that we're sometimes viewed as "out of touch." But today is a call to arms!  Are you going to waste time wishin' and hopin' that the clothes were designed differently - and not dress nicely until they are?  Or are you going to embrace the decision you've made and wear it loud and proud?  Never give up!  Never surrender! 

Choosing modest clothes isn't usually an issue for many of us.

I guess this post mainly goes out to the disgruntled women who say, "Modest clothes suck so it really doesn't matter what I wear."  Not so!  I put together just a tiny sampling of some dresses from recent seasons.  Both the slightly immodest and modest versions of very similar looks.  You'll notice the "not quite right" side (L) is still not extremely revealing, but they seem to be the clothes that cause the trouble.  Sleeveless "but otherwise ok", too low a neckline, a little too short a hemline - just barely outside our limits, the clothes we bemoan the most.  Very revealing clothing rarely makes us hide in frumpville.  We wouldn't necessarily have worn them anyway.  But the examples below show that perfect looks are right around the corner from the near misses.  Just keep looking! (And you might want to click on the image to make it larger.)  

I certainly advocate "working your clothes" to make them appropriate; slipping on a camisole, cardigan, or shrug, lengthening the hem a little, etc. But all that layering just to wear certain styles gets old.  And hot.  Sometimes it's so much simpler to make the modest choice straight of the box.  So next time you're shopping, see what options are out there that truly embrace your lifestyle decision and help you showcase your look! 

What would you be wearing if you were living your perfect life? Maybe you are living that life, but your clothes don’t fit in with the rest of the picture.
Is there a particular goal you’ve been avoiding?  Could better style now help you take the first step toward meeting it?

Fashion and Style are really just your answers to the questions you’re asked every minute of every day.  What am I doing this morning? Afternoon? Evening?  Who am I doing it with? What is/will be the weather?  What is appropriate for the occasion?  How much time do I have to change outfits during the day?  What do I want to project?  What message do I want this outfit to send? What language are my clothes speaking?  Let’s not ever kid ourselves, everything we wear says something, from the underpinnings the public doesn’t see to the smallest of accessories.  Our clothing speaks volumes.  It talks about who we are, how we’re feeling, and what we believe.

Who is the Modern Modest Woman?  She’s trying to look appropriate and up-to-date while setting an example of modesty.  Not content to wander drably with The Frumpy, she is keenly aware that more and more, the world is looking at her not only as an example but also to answer questions about our unique lifestyle.  If what they see looks weird (and weird is the bad side of peculiar) or off-putting, they may consider their questions already answered.  And you can bet it won’t be the most flattering answer.  

I have always loved fashion but it took an embarrassing first business trip at my first real job, when I tried too hard to look “executive” (and failed miserably!), for me to start learning about real style.  Imogen Lamport, a great image consultant from Australia says, “Style is a learning experience, and one that I never stop learning, and my style never stops changing (and that makes it interesting too).”  Image Interpreters is about bringing together the best style and fashion tips and tricks and applying them to our unique lifestyle.

Whether we want to or not, everybody makes a fashion statement - this site is mine.