Yesterday was simply a day I need to share with you. It showcases the real meaning of class and style.  It was a day that started out great but deteriorated quickly into one of those days. Then turned into one of THOSE days. 

I do some consulting for the company I worked for before I had the girls.  Yesterday morning I had a conference call.  Now, these conference calls are few and far between.  When they pop up, I schedule them after breakfast and before lunch, during the first play time of the day.  Normally, the girls are totally oblivious to the fact that I'm on the phone. 

Not yesterday.
Yesterday it was mass whining, wanting everything they can't have, wanting to be on my computer, etc.  I blame the full moon. The call wasn't going to be long and I got testy, snapping a few times to "JUST PLEASE GO PLAY!"

After the call I suggested we head to the mall, where they love to explore.  It was gorgeous out, I had a couple quick errands to run and wanted to check out a cardigan at the Banana Republic Power Lunch sale.  Then the next bout of chaos ensued.
My almost-4-year old, Angle Face, has outgrown her sandals and I pulled out a larger pair waiting in the wings.  She devolved into a demon, throwing the mother of all tantrums of her young life. And I didn't give in. I hate giving in to tantrums AND she has to come to terms with the fact that for the next many years, she will regularly outgrow clothes and shoes. Wishful thinking led me to believe if I had the big battle once, I'd avoid future battles over too-small items.
I dug in my heels.  So did she.  I cajoled, I reasoned, I ordered.  She screamed, cried, and flopped around. I yelled.  There were swats and time-outs.  The twins joined in the fray, getting frustrated that we weren't leaving and this was all taking so long.

Two hours later we were finally loaded up. Correct-size sandals still on the feet but hard feelings all around.  After those crazy episodes quiet down, the reflecting moments always come.  You think about how you could have handled it better, what you did wrong, what you'll hope to remember to do the next time. To regain a happy atmosphere, I suggested we get suckers at the mall.  They love going to Kara's Chocolates and choosing a sucker from their big glass jars.  It was so much fun hearing each girl ask the other girls what flavor they were going to choose.
"I want Woot Beer!"
"I want pink-lellow-lellow!"
"I want geen and balana!"

We all chose about 8 different flavors during the discussion, laughing and happy again.  We skipped into the mall in our long, hand-holding line.  We hit the Banana Republic right next to where we entered, 5 minutes before the end of the Power Lunch 40%-off sale.  On the first table by the door was the cardigan I wanted to evaluate.  Right on top was my size! I grabbed it and headed straight back to the dressing rooms.  We didn't even shut the door.  I just dropped the diaper bag, slipped the sweater on over my shirt, "Looks great! Let's go!", and headed for the registers, not checking out anything else.

Already at the register was a woman, maybe 40-something, with her teenage daughter. They were working with the salesgirl on what sounded like the transfer of some items from the larger Banana Republic north of us.  Being on hold with the other store, the girl waved me forward.  We were on a roll! I plopped down the cardigan and zipped open my bag for my wallet.  The wallet that wasn't there.  The wallet, I realized in a sickening flash, that was sitting at home by my computer.  And no cash for the suckers. My hands flew to my face in shock and I told the girl I'd forgotten my wallet.  She said, "Oh don't worry! We'll save it for you and honor the sale price." I didn't care about the sweater.  I cared about those suckers.  The woman next to me said, "Dang that is SO frustrating! I hate when that happens."  I laughed and answered, "I know! And I almost never carry cash anymore and promised the girls suckers. It's going to be a fun fight when we walk out this door." And we both laughed, mother's who've been there, done that.
As if on cue, all three girls started asking about their suckers.  I leaned over and told them, "We have to go get some money first. Mommy forgot her wallet but we'll get a treat."  Now, I live a solid chunk of miles from this mall.  We weren't coming back that day.

I then turned back around to find the woman holding a bundle of $1's.  "I'd love to get your suckers for you. How much are they?"  I resisted. (My girls would survive just fine.) She insisted. (She's a mom. She knows the value of promised treats.)
So I accepted the dollars and, very teary eyed, led my girls out. 

Three rainbow-stripe watermelon suckers later, we were motoring back to the Banana Republic.  Luckily, she was still there.  I handed her the change and each of my three girls very sweetly said, "Thank you for my sucker!" I also thanked her profusely and she said, "I hope you have a better day."  We definitely did. She saved it and we ended it great.  I was so glad I'd let her help us.  It was the most valuable $2.56 that woman has spent in ages. 

The minute we got home I found five dollars and tucked them into a pocket in my diaper bag. I'm now on the hunt for the next mom in need of her own Sucker Moment.
When I find you, please let me pay this forward.

Well I am finally, blessedly over that beast of a cold.  It settled in my lungs and I couldn't speak five words together without coughing for five minutes. Brutal.  Many decongestant pills later, I'm finally nearly my normal sassy self again. I'm avoiding reclaiming my house and working on a fun blog post instead.
Today is the second part of a question submitted to Ask Image Interpreters. Definitely check out Plus Size Answer Part 1, where I covered the top 3 items I would suggest buying to flatter a plus size figure. Today we're going to cover a few more tips and address some "myths" about plus size dressing.

On the Yahoo Style channel a few weeks ago, a plus-sized stylist did a piece on "Debunking Plus Size Myths."  Here are some of the myths she talked about and my opinion of her answers.

• "Myth 1 - Skinny Jeans are for Skinny Girls." The stylist said, "it's all about proportion" and any plus-size gal can wear skinny jeans if she pairs it with volume on the top. I totally disagree! As I showed in part 1, pants that taper in to the ankles, which skinny jeans and leggings do, create an ice cream cone effect. You end up looking like a big V, with the widest parts of you being the focal point. I agree with Stacy & Clinton from What Not To Wear when they advise women looking to camouflage wider torsos to choose pants and jeans that fall straight down from the widest part of their hips. It's elongating and slimming.
• "Myth 2 - Avoid form fitting clothes." I agree- this is a myth. Clothes that fit your form in the right way are much more flattering than clothes that fit like a tent. Remember - skim don't squeeze. One of the best ways to use this "fit to flatter" rule is by creating a waist.

Let's look at some examples.

No waist...

...waist!!

No waist...

...waist!!
See what I mean?  The clothes skim and create a flattering shape at the right spot.
(The above pictures also extol the virtues of a V-neckline over a rounded one.)

This top is fabulous! With the print on top and a nice dark jean on bottom, all the attention is focused on her lovely face and narrower waist. The top is seriously working overtime to create a long and lean look; it has a V-neckline, it creates a waist with the tie, it skims the hips without going too low, and the half-sleeves show off narrow forearms. 

Per Stacy & Clinton, keeping prints in proportion with your size helps you avoid looking like a curtain or couch.  The diagonal swirling paisleys and bright border draw the eye to the narrowest parts of the body and down to the legs. The sleeve-length is great, not cutting her across the widest part of her upper arm.

So, dear C., I hope these two posts have given you renewed hope for a flattering wardrobe. I'd love to see some pictures of new looks you try out!
Stay tuned this week for a review of sample sale sights, a maternity themed Ask Image Interpreters, and our first question submitted by a man!
All the pictures in this post are from ideeli.com, one of the great sample-sale sights I'll be reviewing.

Oh my goodness, dear readers! I am going on a week of battling the most unrelenting, energy-sapping, brain-fogging, I-didn't-know-a-person-could-be-this-congested, lung-hacking, miserable, please-just-give-me-a-new-head, cold!

I hope to finally kick it this weekend and be back to my old self next week.  For now, please enjoy this quick shot of the newly married royals hosting the Obamas.

I LOVE the simple dress Catherine chose.  She looks appropriate, classy, and understated.  She smartly chose something that would not compete for top-billing, no matter what Mrs. Obama chose to wear. 
Can't see the front, but the spring frock and cute jacket are nice on Michelle.

A: Dearest C - How loudly can I say, "I'VE BEEN THERE!!" In fact, until last year, I was a little heavier than you.  Then I found this, and lost 85 pounds. But before that, I spent 20 years working to flatter a plus size shape. I could write a book about what did and didn't work for me. And yes, there are PLENTY of options beyond jeans and t-shirts. In the interest of clear, concise blog posts, instead of a lengthy novel, I will dole this advice out in a series.  Today, I'll hit on which items I think are your best places to start. And I'll share a few helpful links with you of other resources for brilliant advice.

Now, everybody carries their weight differently.  I tended to carry mine somewhat evenly all over, but with a frustratingly larger portion around my hips. But a few general rules definitely apply to any woman trying to flatter a fuller frame. Let's look at those rules.

For me, that area was the high waist; above my belly button and below my bust.  The absolutely MOST flattering item I ever wore was a wrap dress. Such as this.

It perfectly highlighted the narrowest part of my body, the v-neckline lengthened and slimmed and brought attention up to my face. And below the waist ties, it skimmed and floated over my worst trouble spots. If I could recommend ANYTHING, it would be to immediately go out and invest in a couple matte jersey wrap dresses. As a nice bonus, they adjust with your weight. At my heaviest, I put a camisole under them and tied them a little more loosely. As I lost weight, I ditched the camisole and cinched them tighter.
(The matte jersey is also perfect because it's iron free!)

Try to get TRUE wrap dresses. Meaning, the dress opens fully, not a faux wrap dress that is sewn shut, has a v-neckline but the waist ties don't do much. These can sometimes work fine, but they don't have very much "adjustability."

Here are a couple other dress options that would also flatter in a similar way...

Don't be afraid of belts, as pictured below. They can do a lot to highlight, draw attention to where you want it, and lengthen. Just look how long she looks from the belt down! Longer = Leaner. Just don't cinch too tight. You want to avoid the tied-sausage look.

Our next guideline is...

2. Skim, don't squeeze.

And my next suggestion for you is a pair of wide-leg black trousers. Unfortunately, you'll probably have to iron these, but it'll be worth it! (Actually, take them out of the dryer when they're still a titch damp and hang them by the ankles.  The weight of the top of the pants will help them dry straight and you may be able to avoid the iron completely.)

Take a look at the trousers vs the leggings. It's the perfect illustration of why skim instead of squeeze is so flattering.

Even with the heels and the most flattering picture they could conjure, there's just no denying the drastic difference. The hips and thighs in the trousers looks SO much leaner. No squeezed sausage. 
Choose trousers that fall straight down from the widest part of your hips. If the waist gaps, have it tailored. That small adjustment is rather inexpensive.

The final guideline for the day is...

3. Too much volume amplifies, instead of camouflages.

Technically, both tops skim.  The black detail in A and print in B are both flattering.  But the extreme volume of the bottom blouse is overwhelming.  This is the same model and look how much wider she looks in the bottom picture?  They even had to pull back a bit in the photo.
So my final suggestion for the day is to look for tops with interesting detail to step up a notch from your t-shirts.  I loved jersey knit tops like the pink one, with an empire waist without too much pleating or gathering below (didn't want to look pregnant.)

We'll tackle some plus-size style myths in the next post.  And I'd like to direct you to Inside Out Style for some more great information on how to flatter your figure. Click the name back there and I've directed you straight to her section on plus-size fashion. Imogen is a fantastic image consultant out of Australia.

Sorry for being MIA this week.  I've been working on several Ask Image Interpreters posts and got sidetracked.  But here's a little inspiration for you to dress nice if you attend Sunday services tomorrow!

She has a very unique look and though I haven't seen her in many movies yet, I think she's a good actress.

Love the brown leather pencil skirt!!

Since beginning my weight loss journey several months ago, I have dropped bra sizes several times. I went from a *cough*hack*wow! look over there!" To a 40 C. Then 38 DD. Then 36 D. Now a 34 DD. I certainly don't mind the shrinking process and a couple weeks ago, it was once again time to get some smaller bras. 

Please don't get the idea that 34 DD means I'm some amazingly buxom pinup babe.  I'm normal size. Like most women in America, up until last year I had been wearing the wrong size bra; band sizes way too big and cup sizes way too small. But now I know better!
This is the bra that fit the best this time.

The straps are all elastic, silky, and extremely comfortable.  They never slip and are wider than they appear in the picture above. The picture below is accurate.  The nude above turned out to be too dark under my lightest white shirts so I got the ivory as well as the dark purple below.  The purple one has lace over the band which I've really ended up liking.  It keeps the band more snug.

Why 3 colors?  Click Bra Education in the category list at right for the full scoop!

Now, ever since I did all the research last year into how a bra should fit, I can easily go into Nordstrom Rack, TJ Maxx or other similar stores selling quality bras at a discount and find ones that fit.  But for you, dear readers, I continue to research who provides a proper fitting and who most certainly does not.  For this trip, I hit the University Mall in Provo, UT, beginning at Macy's.

Macy's was like getting a bra fitting at JFK airport.  Have you ever been through JFK?  It's filthy, there always seems to be popcorn on the floor, and nobody speaks English.  The sole saleswoman in sight was extremely intent on helping an older male customer so after waiting way too long, I just started grabbing bras.  I did finally get her to open a fitting room for me, and in a thick accent I could barely understand, she said, "You 36 C."  I could only assume she was employing her X-Ray vision powers because she never pulled out a tape measure.  And I'm not a 36 C, though I did try that size on just in case. 
The fitting room was filthy, even the walls, and inexplicably there was popcorn on the floor! After trying on about 15 bras I left and headed down the mall to Victoria's Secret.

Ah, Vicki.  I like your lingerie but your fitters are clueless. I had not yet had a fitting at VS so I walked in, asked for the best fitter they had, and was directed to a manager.  The saleswoman who greeted me was plenty nice but the manager gave me the stink eye up and down.  No, I'm not a size 2 and neither are you, sister. You might want to check the 'tude in front of a paying customer.
I told her I was here for a fitting and she asked what size I was.  I said I wasn't sure but my current 36 bands were too loose and the D cups were gaping a little.  She asked if they were VS brand, I said no, and still with the stink eye she pulled out her tape measure.  Over my clothes, she wrapped the tape low on my back (below my bra clasp), angled it up at my armpits, and then across my chest above my breasts.  "Well in OUR sizes you're a 38 B. My rooms are all full so just hang out."
I don't mind when company's spend a lot of time on their customers, but during my 25 minute wait, she took three girls in front of me who had arrived after me.  I finally walked over to a set of bras and over my clothes, tried on a 38 B.  On the tightest hooks It just hung there, barely touching me, and the B cups didn't cover half of my girlness. Same with 3 other styles. I laughed and walked out, feeling very Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman. "You work on commission, right? Big mistake. Huge!"

My last stop was Nordstrom.  As always, they were a delight. I told Kate I'd been losing weight and my 36 bands were too tight, cups were gaping a little.  She led me to a lovely and refreshingly clean dressing room and pulled out her tape measure. 
One word about bra fittings, ladies.  Check your inhibitions at the door!  I took off my shirt and she measured me over my bra, which provided a much more accurate reading.  She measured firmly around the rib cage and slightly more loosely around the fullest part of my bust. I rejoiced that she did it correctly. Then she disappeared for a minute and came back with a huge armload of options.  I stripped down and, with her in the room, put on the first one.  It would have been stupid to have her walk in and out a million times. I just turned my back and got on with it. I knew what to look for in terms of fit, but I wanted to see what kind of feedback she would provide.  And she did great! Snugged up the straps just right and gave good suggestions for what to try style wise. We had a good chuckle about how too many women buy bright white bras.  According to Kate, in most other countries, white is a "fashion color" and not the standard color, which I thought was interesting.  The nude closest to your skin color is the best basic to buy.

$100 plus dollars and three bras later I walked out of Nordstrom happy as usual.  Mega kudos to Kate for a great fitting!  Thumbs down to Macy's and Victoria's Secret, at least the University Mall locations. Macy's won't be seeing me again but I might give VS another chance someday. We'll see.

Look what hit Nordstrom yesterday...

Kate's gown was absolutely beautiful, very Grace Kelly but less poufy. By design, she makes very conservative clothing choices which I think is brilliant. She's not out to have everyone gawking over her wacky or overtly sexy clothes.
The dress was designed by Sarah Burton for Alexander McQueen who also designed her sister Philippa's dress below.

My gorgeous niece Paige wore a wedding gown nearly identical to Philippa's dress, but with a higher v-neckline and covered in beautiful lace and beading.

One review I loved, by the usually spot-on Tom and Lorenzo, said, "It fits her like a glove. Love the neckline and the little sleeves. Sleeves, ladies! Today's wedding was all about sleeves! We didn't know this until we started writing about them, but apparently the brides of today are all crying for sleeves in the face of the constant onslaught of strapless wedding gowns thrown at them by the bridal industry. If there's one thing the Middleton gals might manage to pull off in terms of influence, it's that we'll likely be seeing way more sleeve options in next year's bridal collections."

Hear! Hear! All hail sleeves!!
In my world of modesty this is not a "new silhouette," as some reviews called it. We've always done sleeves. But we often have to resort to designers who only work within the realm of modest dresses, or alter sleeveless gowns, which can end up looking not so great. The selection is often a little meager. So the nice thing about having sleeves showcased so prominently on the world stage is hopefully other designers will be inspired. Which will make finding gowns with sleeves much easier and the options broader.

Kate also chose sleeves for her evening gown for the private reception that night. I love that she wore another long dress.  Today was her day to be the world's most famous bride and she lived the day well. It bugs me when women wear lovely gowns for the ceremony but then change into street-walker-worthy mini dresses to "party hard into the night."

I want to close with the above lovely smile between the two and a few excerpts from Dr. Richard Chartres', Bishop of London, sermon.  This man is obviously used to speaking in front of people, he was utterly charming and comfortable up there.  But he had the world's stage for a few minutes and he chose his words very well.  You can find the whole thing by clicking his name, it's not long, but here are my favorite parts.

Be who God meant you to be and you will set the world on fire.” So said St Catherine of Siena whose festival day it is today. Marriage is intended to be a way in which man and woman help each other to become what God meant each one to be.

In a sense every wedding is a royal wedding with the bride and the groom as king and queen of creation, making a new life together so that life can flow through them into the future.

The more we go beyond ourselves in love, the more we become our true selves and our spiritual beauty is more fully revealed. It is of course very hard to wean ourselves away from self-centredness. And people can dream of doing such a thing but should the hope be fulfilled it is necessary a solemn decision is made that, whatever the difficulties, we are committed to the way of generous love.

Marriage should transform, as husband and wife make one another their work of art.

As the reality of God has faded from so many lives in the West, there has been a corresponding inflation of expectations that personal relations alone will supply meaning and happiness in life. This is to load our partner with too great a burden. We are all incomplete: we all need the love which is secure, rather than oppressive, we need mutual forgiveness, to thrive.

All the best to William and Kate. 
I hope their wedding was the first day of a long and very happy life together.

Over Easter weekend Mr. Darcy, our girls and I drove a few hours away to visit some favorite relatives of mine; an aunt, uncle and cousins.  While there, my Aunt A. let my cousin H. (her daughter) and me give her a closet makeover. She told me she hated her closet, didn't like the outfits it was producing and was eager for the purge and subsequent style pump-up.
Once the rearranging began... here's what we found. 

35, that's right, 35 pairs of khaki's in varying lengths and tones of tan.
And 35 is just what was left after the first purge. I forgot to count at the beginning.

Enough polo shirts, mostly white, to outfit a golf pro shop. Second only to the number of polo shirts was the amount of white button downs.

Love this part.

The treats are always delightful.

Mr. Darcy loves these, if they're stale.

One of my favorite parts. Always try to win the egg-cracking contest.