She was truly stunningly beautiful.  But also a great actress. I love the original "Father of the Bride" and "Father's Little Dividend" movies.  "Giant" was fantastic. Love her, and her dresses!, in "A Place In The Sun."

She definitely lived the life of a superstar and left a lot of beauty behind.

- PART 1 -
Alrighty - let's get to it!  As I mentioned in "How NOT to wear coverage tees," I'm on a mission to eradicate the crimes against good style that some folks are committing with these useful, but often misused, fitted t-shirts.
For anyone just joining us, a "coverage tee" or "modesty t-shirt" is a very fitted tee with a higher neckline, longer length and sleeves ranging from small cap to long.

First off, CONGRATULATIONS! This sounds like such an honor and the opportunity for a fun, unique event. I wanted a little extra information from J. and didn't get to post this before the luncheon but I'm going to address it anyway, in case the information is useful for anyone else.
1. Don't dress down. A luncheon of any type calls for "dressy casual." An AWARD luncheon calls for a step up from that.  For an event like this, I'd go with a dress, although the trousers and blouse combo would also work. Just no denim. Period.

Formal wear - be it Cocktail level or Black Tie level - is especially tricky for modest dressers. If a dress is long enough, it tends to show too much skin up top. If the top is covered, it often goes no lower than mid thigh. If the front is covered, it's backless.  If the back is covered, it has a plunging V-neckline! It's quite a conundrum.  If you ever find a formal dress that's timeless, flattering, and modest without modification - BUY IT!
You'll wear it someday, I promise, and it'll be worth every penny. 

J. purchased the dress you see at the top.  She might want something different for next year, so we're going to address the options.

The formal skirt/white button down shirt combo has been hitting the red carpet for a while. And I really like it because it's versatile. The skirt can be paired with different button downs, a brocade tank and shrug as shown above, or a cashmere twinset for less formal occasions. But it has it's own set of rules.

1. It must be truly formal. That means in both shape and material. A simple straight black skirt that you would wear to church is not a formal skirt. Satin works here, a fit/flare shape, something with a train, fancy beading, full with a crinoline, etc. It has to carry the full weight of the formal requirement.
   
2. You have to tuck.  Leaving the shirt untucked kills the look. You don't have to tuck a twinset, but it should be form fitting to balance the fullness of the bottom. Teeter-totter!!
3. Formal skirts can be hard to find outside the holiday party time of year, so start looking this fall and tuck it away if you find one.

Accessories

J. says she's "not a fancy person" so I don't want to overwhelm her with jewelry options she might not be comfortable with but I still want her to have fun with it. And choose things she could use again and again.
For J.'s dress, I suggest long, sparkly earrings and a tennis bracelet or slim bangles.  Maybe a fun cocktail ring.  She has short hair, which will play nicely with the earrings. Chandelier earrings would be lovely. They'll also leave the neckline open and long, which will draw nice attention to the face.

I've also suggested she kick her shoes up a notch. The lower heel with this dress pitches toward frumpy. A higher heel in black or a neutral metallic will be a better option.

If she's not sure how to do evening-event appropriate makeup, I suggest booking an appointment at a makeup counter (Sephora or Nordstrom?) on your way to the event. Or at the very least, a few days before so they can give you a tutorial.

J. sent me a few pictures of last years gala.  There was some sparkle, lots of under-dressed shirt/skirt combo's, several frumpy "Sunday Suits", even a few pants.
I'd have loved to fix up the whole group in a makeover suite!

I think the dress she chose will be appropriate for the room as well as for the occasion.  We don't want her in floor-length sequins with a sweeping train if the rest of the room is in Sunday dress but we also don't want her dressing down just because others don't know the meaning of "Formal Gala Event."  Under-dressed people should never dictate what's appropriate, but too often, it's the properly dressed folks who feel silly. Always dress for the occasion and then wear it with confidence! You'll own the room! And hopefully inspire someone else to dress better next time.

Good luck, J.! We're excited to hear when you win!

I was going to launch my post to answer Julie's question about dressing for a gala event, but luckily I heard back from her today with the extra information I'd asked her for. So I'm tweaking that post to form a more comprehensive answer.  In it's place, please enjoy these Modest Moment's from the Oscars.

An absolutely gorgeous color on her. Beautiful dress.

This dress fired up a lot of debate. It was basically either totally love it or totally hate it. I applaud her for the risky move that it obviously was, she's good at those moves.  And I for one don't mind it at all.  I think the chartreuse accents at the neck/shoulder detract from the look. Had those been the same pink color then your eye wouldn't have zeroed straight in on them, distracting from the other interesting details of the dress.

The detail on this dress might look like cutouts, but no.  They're actually metallic shards affixed to the gown to create the pattern. Not exactly the kind of dress that makes you a great waltzing partner. Ouch! Neckline is too low.

I loved this dress.  I would really love this dress in a less "wedding" color to use for future fancy events I might ever attend.  I don't know if it's her haircut or what, but it didn't come off looking nightgown-ish, like another gown with a crew neckline and sleeves might have. The original version (that I'll actually be showing in another post) widened a lot as it reached the floor, giving it a much more trapeze silhouette.  I like how it was altered to be more sleek and form fitting here.

This really has nothing to do with anything but if you're wondering what makes for a perfect Wednesday, here it is.

Finding your two-year-old twins taking all the stuff out of your wallet and managing not to snap at them...

putting everything back in place and finding nothing missing/torn/chewed...

noticing that you are now 20 pounds lighter than the weight listed on your driver's license (that you totally lied about in the first place when you were 20 pounds heavier than what you put on the license).

As requested, I am working on a post about how to correctly utilize coverage tees.  While you're waiting, study these examples I found today.

Criminal Application of a Coverage Tee


No, no, no, NO NO!!!
What the...???
On what planet is this attractive?!?
Nothing in this solar system.
Nor anywhere the Hubble will ever find.


As I said last week in "How NOT to wear coverage tees," some clothes just won't work.  This looks like she put her swimsuit on over her cover up because she's REALLY worried about sunburn.

These examples came from Apricot Apparel, a company I had not heard of until today. I'm sure they make a fine product (lower the dang neckline!) but their marketing campaign is par for the course with their competitors.

Yes, there was more head bashing when I saw this shot.

I'm putting an APB out on Julie who submitted the question to Ask Image Interpreters about what to wear for her state's "Young Mother of the Year" events.
And CONGRATULATIONS on being nominated!!

I've emailed you a couple of times to get a little more information from you but I'm betting the emails were filtered away to your junk folder.  And now I fear I've missed helping you.  If you see this - please check your email! I resent the message again just now.  If I don't hear from you, I'll post what I have so far and hope that it helps.

It's time to revisit one of my favorite rants.  If you would like the primer for today's post, quickly check out Summertime Snafu from two years ago.
It really should be required reading for all modest dressers.
Done reading? Let's discuss.

When you make the decision to dress modestly you MUST come to grips with the fact that there are certain things you can NOT wear.  Attempting to modify any and all apparel will NOT result in flattering, good-looking outfits.

Case in point...

This display has been driving me bonkers ever since it hit our Costco. 
Please analyze it while I go bash my head against the wall.

Mr. Darcy has repeatedly had to hold me back from climbing up, ripping it down, and running around the store screaming, "THIS IS NOT ATTRACTIVE! If you attempt to wear this to a dressy function, people with a sense of style and half a brain will wonder what is wrong with you!"

This one annoys me less but only slightly so.  It's the casual vs dressy thing. 
Casual-layering gone wrong is easier on the eyes than dressy-layering gone so very wrong. 

The basic fact of the matter is that the silky vest should not have been an option. Or if she was absolutely set on wearing it, a jacket/sweater/blazer should have been added to cover the arms.  The third layer would have demoted it from a first-degree murder of style to involuntary manslaughter.

In order to look our very best, we modest dressers need to come to grips with the fact that spaghetti straps, deep cleavage, and sleeveless/strapless/backless items are no longer  options.  And that's ok!! I do not understand why there is such a war to incorporate these clothes into a modest wardrobe. At least in this unattractive way. 
I have some sleeveless tank-style tops/dresses that I like, but they ALWAYS go under a jacket or cardigan. They are the base layers, never the outer layers.  

When coverage tees first hit the streets the marketing was very logical.  The ads featured women wearing the tees to help cover the midsection when a shirt might rise up too high when the arms were lifted.  Or under a slightly too-sheer shirt/dress.  Or to fill in gaping underarms.  The key? The coverage tee was never the focus of the outfit.

It doesn't surprise me that these companies are trying to evolve their product into more of a center piece but a line needs to be drawn. For the sake of all things stylish, a line must be drawn by each woman in her own wardrobe. If you need some motivation, how about the threat of me and my phone camera finding you and featuring you as a What Not To Wear? I'm on a crusade, people.  It has to stop.

He is delightful.  He is darling.  He's about what my husband will look like in 15 years. 
He will ever be Mr. Darcy to me.  Colin Firth and his gorgeous Italian wife Livia are your mid-week eye candy.  Enjoy.

If her dress is backless, don't tell me!  It's such a gorgeous color and they look so charming together I am determined to see this dress as nothing but glamorous, modest and fabulous.  With the phenomenal success of The King's Speech they've been hitting the red carpet pretty heavy.  Much to my delight.

This photo is from last year and her neckline is a titch too low for me, but check out her shoes! (if you can look away from Firth)  The print is different scale which is really interesting.  I love unique shoes. 

Handsome and brooding even when done up a little kooky by W magazine. 
Love the tie!

So many stars look idiotic in their "I got my walk of fame star" pictures, crouching over the ground.  Not Mr. Firth.  Is this the epitome of casual cool or what?
(I get this same look from my husband quite often. Makes my knees wobble.)

I love movies but I'm not a religious Oscar watcher.  I like the fashions but many times I'm incredulously wondering how the stupid movie that's winning everything ever got funding in the first place.  Not this year.  This year I'll be watching.  Because The King's Speech is a fantastic film and if Darcy doesn't win the Oscar I will personally lead the revolt.  

I apologize for being MIA the last couple weeks. 
Much has been happening at Chez Frump Fighter.  Busy, busy, busy!

A friend and I went to The Pioneer Woman's book signing for her adorable new novel "Black Heels to Tractor Wheels."  It's a happy book.  Get it and enjoy.

All my pictures turned out blurry! So bummed.

And for the point of today's post.  I've been noticing that everyone, including myself, is more than ready for the winter weather to subside.  Folks keep pulling out lighter clothes but then freezing their butts off once they get out of the house. 
So while we're still powering through the final weeks of winter, here's a little challenge to refresh your winter wardrobe.

Pick three items in your closet and pair them with 3 other items you’ve never worn them with. 

While changing accessories can completely change a look – for this challenge, they don’t count. A fresh look at your accessories will happen after you’ve paired the pieces with other tops or bottoms as applicable.  Here are some suggestions to get you started: 
1. a pencil skirt paired with a fancy, fitted t-shirt and cardigan (instead of its matching jacket)
2.  khakis, ankle boots and a trench coat over a thin sweater & blouse (instead of the dark jeans and chunky knits you might have been resorting to)
3. a pale colored sheath dress you normally never wear in winter paired with dark tights, boots (knee or ankle) and coordinating cardigan or jacket. (the dark tights and "heavier" footwear will ground the look and keep you from freezing) 

If you find yourself struggling to find 3 new items for the pairing, try my Walk Your Wardrobe trick.  I discuss it here.